i have been thinking bout this for a very long time.a big decision to make.if i decided to do what i have in mind,maybe everything will turn out like what i wished for OR things will become worse.but i know what i wished will NEVER happen.or perhaps a 1% chance?i am struggling.do or not do.but i don't want any regrets in my life.maybe this is the last chance.i will make myself embarrassed.maybe i'll look like a stupid and an idiot to you or everyone of you.but i really can't help it anymore.all i want is just to tell the truth from the bottom of my heart.i do not anything from it.but just an honest answer.but i just can't do this.somebody please help me.tell me what i should do instead to keep me away from thinking anymore.